Wednesday, October 26, 2005

a real story...

Happy Birthday Bell&Judith


I am doing my assignment for my childcare class and this week''s assignment is to look for an article on child abuse/child bullying any is good with my teacher but yea i was looking through sites earlier on and i came across many sad sad story as in... Real sad but they're really long so i'll just put a short one on child abuse..

If you dont wanna read it, you have to... its just sad knowing that people in the world is abussed =(

“I was abuse with my twin sister for 20 years, older brother and sister was not abuse. I was sat on hot stove, eat my own stool, eat my own vomit, tied up and beaten with a stick and belt, enema treatments given in an awkward way. Beaten on the head with a stick, stand in corner for long hours, eat many bars of soap and black powder, drink liquid soap, stand in snow without shoes. I can go on and on.
It wasn’t once every month or every other six months, it would be almost every day, It would be two or three times a day. It would be always that no one would be home to see this. Dad would be out or (older brother), (older sister), Tom would not be home when this happens. No one ask about our red marks on our faces, or no one at school would ask if there was anything wrong at home. The school teacher did not know what was going on, and I guess no one knows what it is like to be beaten up as a small child, I guess no one knows anything about batter children in those days.
As I walk along with my parents, going to church, I would be very afraid of my parents and also ashamed of them. I would see many people on the street and I would cry inside my mind for help. I would say to myself, ‘look at me, I am being hurt.’ I would also say “Help my twin sister, we need help.
Many times during my abuse I would go into another world and try to daydream to try and avoid the pain. As I am being punished my mind try to wander off in order to avoid the pain. I would dream that I am in a beautiful different world of peace after my pain is over I am still in different world. At times after my beating I would not where I am at. I am lost and confuse. It’s because I was in this other world of vision in my mind.”


This is a true story account about Paul McLauglin

Sunday, October 23, 2005

The future

well i have a rough idea of what i wanna do in my life at a later time
As most people know, i am taking child care so my dream is too travel around the world and take care of different childrens basically, after i earned enough money in one country i move to another like a nomad... well thats what i want to do!! and also taking photos of little babies!! Thats basically it!! haha thats all i have thought!! its good to think but not really good to think so much

Miss the old times

Congrats Clyde&Chel!!

I miss the old timess.... i remember last year this time i finished my PMB and i was so excited about goin to Taiwan and then it was the best time ever ever..... Time just flies the next minute i close and open my eyes i will be going to form5 and then going off to University... i mean my life is getting exciting and at the same time i'm leaving friends and all i'm MISSING IT!!! i wissh somtimes time will just pause and stay... Many times i wanted time to pause like...

when i was in Kaoshuing, Taiwan it was so fun!! so crazy shopping with The cheche...
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and
Last last year's kidsgames i think that was the best kidsgames year for me..
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and
Last year's new year party where everyone was having loads of fun playing 'Mafia' i miss that game... i miss everyone!!
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and
when rae was still in Brunei... yess Rae i do miss you~~
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I mean of course there is more but these are just some examples...
Sadly, Time have to keep going and of course we have to keep going with our life too... i cant stop time and time cant stop me from wanting to keep the memories in a little box in my heart...all those happy memories are safly kept <<33

Saturday, October 22, 2005

My day

After a long holiday, I feel like a bum.. I feel like going out instead of staying in!!! No difference i never like staying in anyways.. I wanna go dVD HUNTiNGG i am so Bored..BORED BORED BORED... I finish every single CSI in the house.. I cant wait for the KK trip.. TRAVELL TRAVELL!! lalala..
Its the end of the year, and every end of year People who left earlier this year come back and people who didnt leav go for their holidays... its the best time of the year actually!!

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Officially not a maths fan

I am today Officially NOT a maths fan... today's exam was just a killer it stressed me out so much... 30 minutes left on the clock and i have not completed two LONG maths Question=*think alot* that really panicked me when i started rushing it jumping from one question to the other jump here jump there... I was so scaared to think... Maths is a thinking subject believe it or not i was actually so afraid to think BECAUSE time's still ticking... i mean who in the world is afraid to think in a stupeed Maths paper..STUPEED STUPEED STUPEEEEDD.... i so scare!!!!!!
-Made the most silly mistake in the record of Jocelyn today in a Maths paper-
I miss the feeling...the "I LOVE MATHS I CAN DO ANYTHING IN MATHS" feeling...
Tomooroowww is my malay 1 paper... I am scared Malay's not my thing..

Saturday, October 08, 2005

Lost Without You by Delta Goodrem

I know I can be a little stubborn sometimes
A little righteous and too proud
I just want to find a way to compromise
Cos I believe that we can work things out

I thought I had all the answers never giving in
But baby since you've gone I admit that I was wrong

All I know is I'm lost without you I'm not gonna lie
How my going to be strong without you I need you by my side
If we ever say we'll never be together and we ended with goodbye don't know what I'd do ...I'm
lost without you
I keep trying to find my way but all I know is I'm lost without you
I keep trying to face the day I'm lost without you

How my ever gonna get rid of these blues
Baby I'm so lonely all the time
Everywhere I go I get so confused
You're the only thing that's on my mind

Oh my beds so cold at night and I miss you more each day
Only you can make it right no I'm not too proud to say

All I know is I'm lost without you I'm not gonna lie
How my going to be strong without you I need you by my side
If we ever say we'll never be together and we ended with goodbye don't know what I'd do ...I'm
lost without you
I keep trying to find my way but all I know is I'm lost without you
I keep trying to face the day I'm lost without you

If I could only hold you now and make the pain just go away
Can't stop the tears from running down my face
Oh

All I know is I'm lost without you I'm not gonna lie
How my going to be strong without you I need you by my side
If we ever say we'll never be together and we ended with goodbye don't know what I'd do ...I'm
lost without you
I keep trying to find my way but all I know is I'm lost without you
I keep trying to face the day I'm lost without you

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My favourite song... its a good song!!=)
Well well i am dancing next week in church!! stressful memorizing steps and there is this paticular step that is called a "not jocelyn step" when its nearly that part che che Alvina and Florence will go, "NO NOT LIKE THAT LIKE THIS(and they do it even girlier)" which btw the way i do it is correct!! its just not as girly!! its so.... so so!! *unexplainable*
Do you know there is a place called babyland in Brunei kuilap!! i didnt even know that!! so weird...

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

My new job

I heard the teachers are reading blogs... haha Ms Mary or whoever if you're reading this... HELLLLLLOOOOOO!! hahaha
Anyways, i just got back from this training.. its for childcare certificate for childcare certificate haha it is in ISB... interestinG!!
My fisrt lesson was... How to communicate wth children??
Well its interesting! i am the youngest in tahat class the rest are like mothers or whatever so its a bit scary and you know me i am not public speaking material i practically shake!!=) so i was quietest in class... i know first time... i'm always talking in school class;) ;) ;) I am thinking whether i should take that for my major? haha still not that sure yet!! =P
Tomorrow is Puasa so no Basketball scheme training... Yay!! no torture... my coach so carcat!!HAHAHA

Monday, October 03, 2005

Planet shakers

Planet shakers going to K.K and if people wants to go they can register... i know i am going!! its gonna be awesome i think i have seen them once in Penang but i didnt really notice when my brother told me who they were!! i was not so old to know who planet shakers then.... NOW i do ;)its cool!!
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fun saturday and typical 'typical' sunday

On saturday after ydm, as usual i was hanging around and all and about 7 i went near to the church building and you know what song i heard... "SHOUT YOUR FAME" well its a good song but it doesnt sound good...i was asking people "WHO'S WORSHIP LEADING" someone almost answered me when i decided to take the risk praying its not who i think it is.... GUESS WHAT?? IT IS!!! i had to do the projector!!! AHH~ i mean so soon.. hahaha whenever she's singong automatically i am doing it or else baby chloee is not mine! hehe and i want baby chloe she is too cute to NOT want so anyways after that me and gang went TPH to eat.. I DONT LIKE THE FOOD!! i only like the pearl milk tea!! haha I LOVE PEARL!! Anyways, after dinner we went to play pool i beat abby muahahaha i must admit its pure luck i mean i aim for this hole it goes in to another one and i just pretend that i was skillful haha!! but i couldnt do it wit Raymond my luck flew away!! like practically none went in.. =( Oh well! haha i suck at it anyways
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This morning during comunion... for the power point on the cover page which is a picture of Jesus there was this little cartoon thingy with a mean face pointing a middle finger.. No one noticed it until stephen went up to Che che alvina and told her.. when she told me i GOT abit scared... well you know me i am scared of scary stuff... After service Che Alvina and I were like.. see now see now haha really have man... so wack whoever put it there!! haha its a cartoon thingy.. when she first told me i thought was some picture like i dunno like a flash of picture.. JUST his imagination but yah just a little cartoon picture